The Things That Are Making Us Stronger

Right before Ian and I got married we bought a car for me, and 6 months before that Ian bought a new truck for him. They were both used, but we took out loans for them and they were at the top of our budget. We were nervous, but grateful as we anticipated them to be long-lasting reliable vehicles.

Many of you have heard the horror stories of mechanic bills for not one.. but BOTH the car and truck! Ian’s truck was three thousand dollars right after he brought it home. The guy gave him a trashed motor in a great looking newer truck. We didn’t take it to the mechanic first cause “we wanted to save money”… insert facepalm.

THEN about 3 months before we got married we bought my car and three weeks after that, it was just under FIVE thousand dollars to fix. Yeah, you read that right. This time we did get an inspection with a mechanic and it passed with no issues. We did not have that kind of money to fix it. We borrowed it from Ian’s dad and was hoping with a brand-spankin’ new motor, it would last us a long time (round 2). Thankfully I still have it and only have to do maintenance type stuff! Yay! We did end up selling Ian’s truck a year later.

Remember when?

I bet you are remembering back to when you first got married or started a new chapter in your life and that huge expense came up, or maybe one after another. It’s hard. It feels like it will swallow you. It feels like it will be like that forever.

I remember being so so frustrated and had just gotten a new job, that I did not love. I felt SO much pressure to hit goals and get that bonus to help pay for this stupid car. On top of trying to plan a wedding and not make Ian change his mind about marrying me, LOL! It’s true. Poor guy saw my true colors before we got married! He’s a saint.

It doesn’t end.

Sadly it doesn’t end. The cars get fixed, the water heater gets replaced, you have to sell your house for significantly less than you bought it, you have to find a “new normal”. Whatever it is, there will always be something. There will always be something that feels like it’s setting you back. Pushing you to your limit. Making you think “how is this going to work now??”. Maybe you’re nodding your head and thinking “girl if only you knew what was happening in my life right now. This is me. I am at my limit!”

But it’s shaping you.

Just today, Ian texted me “I have bad news”. He proceeded to tell me how the truck had to be towed to the shop this morning right as he was leaving for work (this is a different one than I spoke of earlier).

My first thought was I was grateful the final bill wasn’t more. His previous truck was thousands every time it went in, and we were regulars. My next thought was I was grateful this was something we could fix.

After my brother died, I have always had the thought “at least no one died”.

There is NOTHING that compares to that. Only those who have suffered a traumatic loss will truly understand that feeling. I hope you don’t.

While I took Ian to pick up his truck, I thought about our car problems a few years back and remembered how we always had food. We had a house and each other. I could easily look at the bright side now and not let this get to me. ONLY because of the past. I learned a very valuable lesson then and I didn’t know it until now.

What is happening today, yesterday, and everyday is shaping you. It’s pushing you to your limit so you can be stronger next time. And it’s not just you. I think it’s easy to get in the mindset that “bad things only happen to me”. You have to stop thinking like this! Anyone that is human and breathing literally has the same feelings as you. Different circumstances, but similar emotions. And trust me, if they haven’t had that feeling yet, they will. Simply because they are human.

Through this move, I have thought more than I ever have that God is going to take care of us.

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?”

Matthew 6:26-27

Even God fully takes care of the birds and you are way more valuable than them. And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?

Wow. Perspective, y’all. You may not know it yet, but what you’re going through right now and have in the past is making you stronger. You’re becoming a better person because of it. You may even have the opportunity to help someone else through a similar situation. That’s pretty amazing.

Until next time – HH